Wednesday, May 12, 2004
Looking forward to the day....
I am looking forward to the day in which I spend no amount of time whatsoever thinking about breast cancer.
Today was not that day.
This morning I took my second pill of what will be five years' worth of Tamoxifen. There was a segment on The Today Show about younger women with breast cancer. I'm very tired and felt groggy all day; I wondered if it was effects of the chemotherapy or of the drug I'm now taking. I wonder if I will have any of the medical side-effects I was not supposed to look up. I had a conversation with a coworker about my impending tattoo. I'm writing a blog entry about it.
Maybe there will be a day I forget to worry if too much scalp is showing through on the back of my head. Maybe that pill will become so routine that I won't even think about it as I heap it in a pile with my drugstore brand claritin, sudafed, and multivitamin. Maybe I will see my reflection and not even notice the scars.
I'm told it will happen, but it's hard to imagine now.
Today was not that day.
This morning I took my second pill of what will be five years' worth of Tamoxifen. There was a segment on The Today Show about younger women with breast cancer. I'm very tired and felt groggy all day; I wondered if it was effects of the chemotherapy or of the drug I'm now taking. I wonder if I will have any of the medical side-effects I was not supposed to look up. I had a conversation with a coworker about my impending tattoo. I'm writing a blog entry about it.
Maybe there will be a day I forget to worry if too much scalp is showing through on the back of my head. Maybe that pill will become so routine that I won't even think about it as I heap it in a pile with my drugstore brand claritin, sudafed, and multivitamin. Maybe I will see my reflection and not even notice the scars.
I'm told it will happen, but it's hard to imagine now.
Comments:
Believe me Janet, there will be plenty of days in the near future in which you won't think about breast cancer. I know it's hard to imagine, but have I ever lied to you? 8)
I never thought a day would go by where I didn't think about what my mom was going through, but after the chemotherapy was over, and as she got better and better (and you will as well) there were less and less reasons to think about it.
And yes, there are days where she doesn't think about it either. I asked.
Realistically though, even years later, you'll certainly think about it from time to time, but I hope it will be looking back on something difficult in your life that you overcame. A challenge you met and beat. Perhaps you'll even decide to spend time educating others about it. You're certainly qualified in more ways than one. *Hugs your brain*
~Jason
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I never thought a day would go by where I didn't think about what my mom was going through, but after the chemotherapy was over, and as she got better and better (and you will as well) there were less and less reasons to think about it.
And yes, there are days where she doesn't think about it either. I asked.
Realistically though, even years later, you'll certainly think about it from time to time, but I hope it will be looking back on something difficult in your life that you overcame. A challenge you met and beat. Perhaps you'll even decide to spend time educating others about it. You're certainly qualified in more ways than one. *Hugs your brain*
~Jason
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: 9:06 AM
: 9:06 AM 
