Monday, March 19, 2007
Insult to Injury: or, who is that alien in the mirror?
If it's not bad enough to be bloated and mostly bald, with eyebrows that are jumping ship even as I type, now I am dealing with an issue I really haven't had to consider for a while.
I laugh when I see those moisturizer commercials which promise you can have skin that looks "ten years younger." I currently have the skin of a fifteen-year old. I have acne all over my face, head, and neck. It's around my ears, blanketing my forehead, dripping down my cheeks. The bumps are mostly small, at least, but there are more of them than I remember ever seeing before. I never had acne like this even when I WAS fifteen, and I by no means had clear skin.
In fact, I had acne well into my twenties but it had finally gone away. I was happy to have clear skin; I felt I deserved it after years of misery and over-the-counter treatments.
Dr. Hayes seems to think it is a reaction to the Avastin. I dunno. It started after resuming Abraxane; I don't know why adding back Abraxane would make the Avastin suddenly produce this effect. My head itches constantly, and most of the bumps are mildly painful. Acne products do no good, they just make my skin more red and peely. I have given up wearing my red wig because placing red hair on top of a red face looks awful. I have (mostly) given up wearing my brown wig because wearing stuff on my head is itchy and uncomfortable. I'm wearing hats to work, but they are hot, itchy, and uncomfortable. I don't leave the house on weekends because it's too much effort to try to cover the blotches, paint eyebrows, ring my eyes with liner so that I look like I have actual eyeballs and not currants sunk into my red, lumpy head.
I wanted to call in "ugly" to work today.
Next Tuesday I will be seeing a dermatologist for the first time, who will probably go, "hmmmm. You have a rash." I wonder if he or she will have the miracle cure.
I laugh when I see those moisturizer commercials which promise you can have skin that looks "ten years younger." I currently have the skin of a fifteen-year old. I have acne all over my face, head, and neck. It's around my ears, blanketing my forehead, dripping down my cheeks. The bumps are mostly small, at least, but there are more of them than I remember ever seeing before. I never had acne like this even when I WAS fifteen, and I by no means had clear skin.
In fact, I had acne well into my twenties but it had finally gone away. I was happy to have clear skin; I felt I deserved it after years of misery and over-the-counter treatments.
Dr. Hayes seems to think it is a reaction to the Avastin. I dunno. It started after resuming Abraxane; I don't know why adding back Abraxane would make the Avastin suddenly produce this effect. My head itches constantly, and most of the bumps are mildly painful. Acne products do no good, they just make my skin more red and peely. I have given up wearing my red wig because placing red hair on top of a red face looks awful. I have (mostly) given up wearing my brown wig because wearing stuff on my head is itchy and uncomfortable. I'm wearing hats to work, but they are hot, itchy, and uncomfortable. I don't leave the house on weekends because it's too much effort to try to cover the blotches, paint eyebrows, ring my eyes with liner so that I look like I have actual eyeballs and not currants sunk into my red, lumpy head.
I wanted to call in "ugly" to work today.
Next Tuesday I will be seeing a dermatologist for the first time, who will probably go, "hmmmm. You have a rash." I wonder if he or she will have the miracle cure.
Labels: Abraxane, acne, Avastin, baldness, Dr. Hayes, eyebrows, hair
Comments:
Hey, I have acne. Its painful no doubt I love that line "I wanted to call in "ugly" to work today."
Sites with good info are
The Acne Treatments Site and Acne.org are great.
I am on roaccutane and its going great that is what my derm gave me. Good luck with it.
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Sites with good info are
The Acne Treatments Site and Acne.org are great.
I am on roaccutane and its going great that is what my derm gave me. Good luck with it.
